Benefits of Polyamory #1

When your kid gets stuck on math, and you are dyscalculic, you can call your boyfriend the math geek and have him talk kid through it on speakerphone.


Supporting your family

Today my husband and I went to watch The Boy sing in a recital. He’s been doing voice training for a couple years now, and I have been itching with curiosity to hear him sing, but I knew that you don’t just belt one out. Well. He’s a countertenor, which means he sings a very high tenor or in the alto range. This is pretty rare vocally. I thought it was just gorgeous. And he adores being in front of a crowd and performing, too!

So he went  home and went to bed (cause he didn’t sleep the night before…wonder why…) and we headed home, getting sandwiches on the way.  Came home, and Eldest Son showed up with Friend 1 and Friend 2 to help move heavy things. So they took the armoire out of the house, to the wood shop, where it will have more shelves installed and serve to hold things, and then I loaded Friend 1 and Eldest into the van and Friend 2 rode with husband to the storage unit, where stuff was loaded in the trailer. It was absolutely POURING rain by the time we went the two miles over to the storage unit, but the boys didn’t care. They got it in, got the tools unloaded, and headed off. That means most of the large things like table saws are in, if not in final placement, and we’re down to three loads. One will be smaller tools and toolboxes, the rest is random stuff stored in the garage and some household things, including a daybed and mattress. (I need to find a home for the daybed temporarily; when we get the basement reworked, it can go down there to be a migraine room bed.)

And then we napped a bit, and I had about two hours on the phone with The Girl. She wants me to get Paypal so she can send me the part of her check she doesn’t want to waste. It will be applied to the Relocate The Girl fund. And past that, I’ll put it into getting a new pretty quilt and curtains for her bedroom.

The Boy came in as we talked and I hung up and we went out and got a gyro and talked a lot about this and that and the other. He’s very interested in meeting The Girl, having heard her voice on the phone. And then we went back to my house and played sexual humiliation games. We like those games. He offered up some rather interesting ideas for things to do among the four of us, and I have to say… yeah. I don’t do polyamory for the sex. But it’s a really nice component!  I used to think I couldn’t do polyfidelity; I think it’s just a matter of having a large enough group to be faithful to. And I think the four of us is good.

Unreal clarity

I lost most of my day today to a migraine.

This has happened a lot lately. I don’t feel particularly stressed, though I can identify component of stress in my life. But this is spring, and the weather is consequently a bit tumultuous, and with each front comes another trigger.

There’s nothing I can do when they hit but to put my life on hold and go to bed in a dark room, and eventually to sleep. I prefer to sleep through the duration of the migraine. Usually my body will let me. Sometimes I have auras, sometimes I don’t. I always have some hangover, and rarely it’s the slight mania that is so NICE when one has lost six hours of the day. Usually it’s a stale, sticky dysthymic feeling that seizes on the undone work and attempts to say things about it never getting better.

On the good side, I wasn’t tapped to help unload debris from the old garage at the transfer station. And one sure way for me to lose weight fast is to skip meals.

I’ve come to an understanding with this. It’s no good trying to work through it, or pretend it’s not there. I do what I can to avoid triggers, of course, but some, like the weather, are things that I can’t do anything about. And what can’t be cured must be endured.

I have the evening ahead, and that is mine to use as I will. That’s something, at least.

Cast of Characters

I think it’s probably just as well to give you a cast list.

The Lady: The author of the blog.

Bear: The Lady’s husband of 25 years. A former trucker/law enforcement officer/fireman, he is now retired on disability and does what he wants. Sometimes.

Eldest: The eldest child of The Lady and Bear. He is 20, and on the autism spectrum. He does not live with his parents.

Youngest: The youngest child of The Lady and Bear. He is 15. He does not live with his parents.

The Boy: My submissive boyfriend. We have been together a little over a year, and it’s wonderful.

The Girl: A submissive girl we are considering and hope to someday move in with us.

Other subsidiary characters include Bear’s Dad (The Old Fart), and my mother and father (Rabbit and Autism Asshole) and my biosister and her family. (The Bitch, Bitch’s Husband, and The Niece.)

Also appearing are Arthritis, Fibromyalgia, Migraine, PTSD, Autism, and ADHD, usually when we least want them.

Hello world!

The blog title comes from my attempt to sum things up in a short paragraph on Daily Kos. “Busy being subtly weird in the Midwest”.

I disguise the Weird under a mild-mannered working class front. An ordinary housewife; loves to cook and enjoys keeping house and decorating, a mother busy getting her kids launched into independent adult life, a good friend and intelligent liberal with lots of opinions.

Underneath it is the Weird….the kink, the polyamory, the bisexuality, the paganism, the history and science geek, the autism, the pain, and the hair.

But like snow over a landscape, the weird does show through in places. And that’s okay. Those with eyes to see, let them see.